Are you prepared when a loved one dies? This question is an introspective pause after losing a friend and one of Houston’s finest, Sylvester Turner, a U.S. representative for Texas’s 18th congressional district who passed away March 5, 2025, in Washington, D.C., far away from his Acres Home roots in Houston, Texas. His death was untimely and unexpected. Losing a loved one is incredibly difficult, and it’s natural to feel unprepared for the moment. While it’s impossible to be fully ready for the emotional impact, there are proactive steps you can take to help manage the practical aspects.
Legal and Financial Matters: Ensure that wills, insurance policies, and other essential documents are up-to-date and accessible.
Support Network: To help you navigate the grieving process, you can lean on friends, family, neighbors, or support groups.
Self-Care: Take care of your physical and mental health. It’s okay to seek professional help if needed. Grief has no time frame.
Memorial Planning: Discuss preferences for memorial services or other ways to honor your loved one’s memory. This is a tough topic, but having preparations in place can provide some peace of mind. How do you feel about this?
What Are Some Ways To Cope With Grief?
Coping with grief is a profoundly personal journey. Different strategies work for other people and cultures. Consider these approaches:
Express Your Feelings: Talk about your emotions with friends, family, or a therapist. Writing in a journal can also be a therapeutic outlet.
Create Rituals: Establishing traditions to honor your loved one can provide comfort and connection.
Stay Active: Physical activity, such as walking, yoga, cycling, swimming, or another form of exercise, can help alleviate stress and improve your mood.
Seek Support: Support groups can connect you with others who understand what you’re going through.
Practice Self-Compassion: Be kind to yourself and allow yourself to grieve at your own pace. It’s okay to have bad days. Never apologize.
Engage in Creative Activities: Art, music, or other creative outlets can be ways to express grief and find solace.
Maintain Your Routine: Keeping a routine can provide a sense of normalcy and stability during a turbulent time.
Complicated Grief Requires Professional Help.
Prolonged grief disorder results from complicated grief. It is characterized by intense and persistent symptoms that interfere with daily life and don’t improve. Some signs include:
Intense Sorrow and Pain: Persistent and overwhelming sadness and emotional pain.
Preoccupation with the Loss: Constantly thinking about the deceased and the circumstances of their death.
Avoidance or Excessive Focus on Reminders: Avoiding reminders of the loved one or being excessively focused on them.
Difficulty Accepting the Death: Struggling to come to terms with the reality of the loss of a loved one.
Numbness or Detachment: Feeling emotionally numb or detached from others.
Bitterness or Anger: Experiencing bitterness or anger related to the loss.
Feeling Life is Meaningless: Believing life has no purpose without the deceased.
Depression and Self-Blame: Experiencing deep sadness, guilt, or self-blame.
Suicidal Thoughts: Having thoughts of suicide or wishing to have died along with the loved one.
As Your Proactive Caregiver Advocate, I remind you that grief is a journey that each person navigates in their way. Being patient and allowing yourself to feel and express your emotions is essential. Remember, seeking support and leaning on others when needed is okay. Healing doesn’t mean forgetting; it means finding a way to move forward while cherishing the memories of your loved one. Take care of yourself, and know that having good and bad days is okay. You’re not alone in this. Be Safe! Be Well!
Dr. Cynthia J. Hickman, a retired registered nurse and case manager, is the CEO of Your Proactive Caregiver Advocate. She has released several books, including The Essential Caregiver Training Course for Corporations and Community, From the Lens of Daughter, Nurse, and Caregiver: A Journey of Duty and Honor, and The Black Book of Important Information for Caregivers.