Who would not like to grow old in their own home? You know, the house where you planted flowers and tended to your garden each year. The home where lasting memories make one smile. The designated home where holiday dinners were enjoyed. The house where you raised your children. The home where special remodeling projects were done to make it comfortable as you age. Whether we acknowledge it or not, change is hard! It is tough to leave a home full of memories. The reality is that aging occurs with every good morning and every good night. What goes along with aging are health challenges, mobility issues, and the need for oversight and care.
Signs are ever-present. Climbing stairs, vision changes, knees hurt, bending over is challenging, hearing has diminished, and managing daily chores has increased in time. Falling becomes a constant concern as our aging loved ones try to manage their new normal. As you observe these situations in your loved ones, the conversation should turn to what is best for safety’s sake. Is it time to consider the journey from their home to yours?
A lot goes into relocation, especially if the home is owned. Let’s not think about the years of stuff and things that must be sold, donated, or given away. That takes time! Moving loved ones is a process that should be well thought out. If your loved one can communicate with you, they should be part of the conversation. They will need support, love, and empathy as they face the reality of leaving behind what they hold dear. Shifting a caregiver’s mindset to what is best and safe for an aging loved one is necessary.
No one will ever take care of your loved one like you will. Having that familiar, loving hand to hold reassures an older adult. If your elderly parents are still living in their home alone and unattended, safeguards while in place (cameras, Life Alert, neighbors) are temporary.
As Your Proactive Caregiver Advocate, consider permanent safeguards. Think about these factors: Is the home single-story or two-story? Is the use of walking aids necessary? Are neighbors periodically checking in on your loved one? Is this approach sustainable? Moving may be necessary. Give your loved one time to adapt to their possible new normal. Remember… relocating your loved one from their home to yours requires time. Be safe! Be well!
Dr. Cynthia J. Hickman is a retired registered nurse and case manager who is the CEO of Your Proactive Caregiver Advocate. She is excited to share her latest book, The Essential Caregiver Training Course for Corporations and Community. Her earlier works, From the Lens of Daughter, Nurse, and Caregiver: A Journey of Duty and Honor, and The Black Book of Important Information for Caregivers, reflect her experiences and insights gained during her heartfelt caregiving journey.